Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Satan Loves It When Books Are Harmed


Gouger Library Supplies knows that librarians need to stretch every dollar in their measly budgets. We share your feelings of furious outrage at book vandals and thieves. Our newest product will stem the tide of mangled materials and shredded volumes.

It works on the premise of superstition and guilt. Biblioklepts and their kind will feel a terrifying pang of dreadful foreboding when they spy a Hex Libris Bookplate adorning your library's volumes. These handsomely evil bookplates are made from a unique type of self-adhesing vellum. They're crafted from real sacrificial lambskin! Each bookplate is decorated with a wickedly adorable devil's head (pictured) and a inscribed with a chilling Gouger-Tested Librarian's Curse:
  • If This Book Ye Not Return, Forever in Hell Shall Ye Burn!
  • Theft of Books Bears a Heavy Toll, Be These Pages Worth Thy Soul?
  • As Thy Taxes Pay My Wages, I Curse the Shit Who Rips These Pages!
  • Return Me In Days Three Times Seven, Or Never Shall Ye Enter Heaven!
Shame, Guilt, and Fear. Hex Libris brand bookplates utilize this noble triumvirate to reduce your library's losses. Order 10,000 or more and we'll add your library's name and logo for free.

Item #165-Hex Libris Bookplates-$6.66 per thousand

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