Every library loses an alarming percentage of their holdings through intentional malefaction. Whether it's vandalism, abuse, or simply never returning a borrowed item the costs are staggering. Let the public share in your righteous outrage. Let them see just how much their library loses through the acts of greedy creeps and cloddish morons. Let them see the figures in cold hard cash.
Try out Gouger's new Thoughtless Bastard Monitoring Meter. You''ll get all the gear necessary to give the public the information they need. Our easy-to-install system ties into your existing collection database and calculates library losses in real time. Patrons will stare in angry indignation as the numbers on the Digital Damage Sign change in front of their eyes. The system can even be configured to name individual bastard patrons if desired or dared. All necessary hardware, software, and underwear included.
Keep patron awareness of library loss livid. Get a Thoughtless Bastard Monitoring Meter and let the world know that ripping libraries off costs everybody. And everybody is pretty friggin' mad. Order immediately.
Item #184-Thoughtless Bastard Monitoring Meter-$495 (please specify size/gender of underwear)
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