Librarians are often treated like gods. Specifically, Hercules laboring in the Augean stables. Every library is cursed with patrons who, for unfathomable reasons, live to befoul the bathrooms. All staff members have their suspicions as to the identity of these loathsome cretins, but proving it is both awkward and disgusting. Even if you are sure, who the hell wants to deal with that situation?
Unlike Hercules, your staff doesn't have any handy rivers to divert to clean the john. Some lucky soul breaks out the gloves, brushes, and chemical goodies and retches their way through the task. Gouger says "No more!". Being librarians ourselves, we feel your smelly pain and dry heaves. That's why we've come up with the sensational Scarnner Scanner. Set this system up at any desk and your body fluid cleanup days are over.
This revolutionary restroom monitor scans each patron's library card as they enter the can. If the sensitive sensors detect a rise in the filth levels (smells and surfaces), the Silent-But-Deadly Alarm is activated. If you choose to confront Piggy the Patron, the choice is yours. Should you chose not to, the Scarnner Scanner will end their reign of poopy terror for you. With one terabyte of memory, this fine machine remembers all offenders. Your bathroom doors lock tight whenever any clinchpoop approaches . Give this life and sanity saving product a try. It's craptactular!
Item #172-Scarnner Scanner-$74.99
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